The Worst Wife Ever…

http://mrsmulkey.wordpress.com/2014/02/19/the-worst-wife-ever/

Tonight my husband was looking over my shoulder while I was reading this blog post titled “The Worst Wife Ever” and said “Honey, is that your blog?”

For serious husband?! This was sooo my laugh of the day.

P.S. I rarely listen when he talks either

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What I should have added to my bucket list…

Go a whole year without attending a wedding (or any wedding festivities for that matter).  I’m no hater but weddings are only important to the people in them and their immediate families and sometimes not even them.

I only have about three hobbies: reading, baking, and camping.  My problem is I work, on average, two weekends every month and all these wedding festivities are cutting into the little time I have to enjoy my hobbies.

As someone that is barely out of the newlywed stage (married 14 months) I probably shouldn’t be complaining but here is why I feel I’m entitled to:  only close friends and family were invited to my bridal shower and I had exactly 10 guests at my wedding.  Granted there are a few more people I would have loved to have at my wedding that were unable to travel for it.

So far I have two weddings to go to this spring: one for my younger brother and one for one of my first cousin.  Both weddings I knew about in 2013 and I vowed for those to be the only two weddings I attend in 2014.  I fully realize this all makes me sound like a little bit of a Grinch.

I think my real problem with weddings runs a little deeper.  First, it’s so insane to spend $20,000+ on a single day.  But then again, many people expect mommy and/or daddy to foot that bill.  So there is no motivation to only invite those you are close to, instead they invite just about everyone they’ve ever met because hey, there’s more gifts!  I seriously went to a wedding last year where the bride and groom registered for all kinds of extremely expensive crap and just kept having bridal showers until most of it was purchased.  By the time the wedding arrived there was almost nothing to choose from on their registry.

Weddings become all about the gifts, the colors, the flowers, the centerpieces, and less and less about the love of the two people getting married.  No wonder the divorce rate is hovering around 50%.  All I wanted was a pretty dress (I’m a lady after all) and the smiling face of my groom.  We didn’t even have a reception after we returned from our destination wedding and there was a simple reason for that: I didn’t get married for the gifts.  Sure, we did have some very generous friends and family members that wanted to celebrate our union with gifts and, trust me, they were very much appreciated but in no way expected.

My goal was and always will be to have a marriage more beautiful than my wedding.  Brides don’t loose sight of what’s important and make sure it’s the marriage you want because that is what you are left with after the wedding.

Olbrich Park <3

Prior to compiling my 40 before 40 list one of the things I had always wanted to do was have fall engagement photos.  This is an engagement photo of my now-husband and I taken by the fabulous Laura Zastrow Photography.  This the the bench he took me to on one of our first dates, it faces the Wisconsin State Capitol and is incredibly beautiful, especially at night.  It is also the sight of where we got engaged.

Prior to compiling my 40 Before 40 list one of the things I had always wanted to do was have fall engagement photos. This is an engagement photo of my now-husband and I taken by the fabulous Laura Zastrow Photography. This the the bench he took me to on one of our first dates, it overlooks Lake Monona facing the Wisconsin State Capitol and is incredibly beautiful, especially at night. It is also the sight of where we got engaged. Originally, I had included this picture on my previous post but after reflection I wanted to give a little more background on this photo and why it is so special to me (and to give the proper credit to our amazing photographer Laura Zastrow). This photo is making me long for fall as I stare out my window at 5 inches of fresh snow. 

 

40 Before 40


So I know I’m not even 30 yet but being only weeks away from my 29th birthday would give me little over a year to accomplish all the things I’ve been waiting my whole life (so far) to do.  With limited time and even more limited funds I’ve decided look past the milestone of 30 for the moment and set 40 goals to accomplish by the time I’m 40 years old.

1. Have a baby- Admittedly I thought this would be the focus of my blog when I first considered writing this blog but now it seems like such a narrow focus.  Yes, it is a huge part of my life at the moment but there are other things I want to do and accomplish and this list might actually let me relax about the baby stuff for a moment a focus on some of those other things.

2. Camp in all of the Wisconsin State Parks with camping facilities- My husband and I have a decent start on this and since we adopted a 1973 Stardust Swinger pop-up camper last summer we might make camping more of a priority this year.  Update to come later.

3.  Go Scuba Diving

4. Create a blog-  A couple of years ago I took a class called “The Art of the Memoir” in which we read & reflected on memoirs.  As part of the class we were also required to write a memoir piece.  I was dreading having to read what 20 years old consider important events in their lives but for the most part they surprised me.  It is incredibly hard for most people to open up and let themselves be vulnerable to people they barely know.  Since then I have often thought of doing more memoir pieces but have not had an outlet…until now!

5. Go on a cruise

6. Tour a southern plantation

7. Take a hot air balloon ride

8. Travel to Italy

9. Drink wine in Napa Valley

10. Get a tattoo with my husband

11. See the Northern Lights

12. Take yoga classes

13. Eat at a famous restaurant- Perhaps one of Tom Colicchio’s?

14. Take a helicopter ride

15. See a psychic/get my palm read

16. Swim with dolphins

17. Go whale watching

18. Buy a piece of art I fell in love with

19. Learn to drive a stick shift

20. Buy a house

21. Swim in an ocean

22. Create family traditions

23. See a baseball game at Fenway Park- I’m not even a Red Socks fan but it’s so iconic

24. Go to Disney World

25. Admire the art in the Met

26. Tour a castle

27. Spend a day at a spa

28. Go to Rocky Mountain National Park

29. See the Smoky Mountains

30. Own a Bernese mountain dog

31. Visit the Georgia Aquarium

32. See the Pandas at the Memphis Zoo

33. Learn another language

34. Be an audience member on a t.v. show

35. Travel to New Orleans

36. Pay off my student loans

37. Ride in a limo

38. Take a graduate level course

39. Try acupuncture

40. Read or reread 50 books between now and my 40th birthday- Reading is a hobby I have enjoyed since a child but rarely make the time for anymore and that needs to change.